Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Mega Mag!!! $$$$

Have you ever seen My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding? You know, the glam, the glitz, the over the top parties that makes us normal people question their sanity? Well, that show doesn't even begin to show the life of real gypsies. 
For all of you not in the Augusta area, I'm about to blow.your.mind. 

Right across the bridge in North Augusta, we have a gypsy camp called Murphy Village. (They prefer to be called Travelers, not gypsies but whatever.) Gypsies fascinate me. Like, I want to be their friend. And I want them to teach me how to do my hair, because seriously y'all, they are pros! I've put my best creeping skills at work to snag a few pictures off the Facebook for you so you understand where I'm coming from. 

See! That hair! And this is tame!

Travelers talk 90 to nothing all.the.time. You can hardly understand what they're saying. Well, I can because I'm like 1/2 gypsy or something. ha! {kidding. kind of.} Just like regular people, there are definitely good and bad travelers. They steal most everything, or try to play let's make a deal. They marry their cousins, most of them are married by 15, and immediately start having babies. In the summer, the guys are always away "working." They go up North and out West (where no one knows who they are) and do labor jobs. They ask if they can paint your barn, blacktop your driveway, cut your grass, etc and charge you ridiculous amounts of money. But, they water down their paint and don't cut your grass well, and use paint on your driveway instead of actual blacktop to do it the cheapest way possible. Once you've figured out what they did, they've already sent your money back home to their wives and are well on their way to another town.
Travelers always dress to the nines, including the children. Gaudy is probably the best word to describe them.  They flood all of the Japanese and Italian restaurants on Friday and Saturday nights in their best clothes. Complete with pounds of make up and jewelry strategically placed on every inch of their body. My cousins from Alabama were in town once and thought there was beauty pageant in town. That's how they dress...every time they go out. Now, you'll see them at the local Walmart in regular clothes, but even their yoga pants are designer. They say MEGA MAG, or BUCKING MAG and always use a million dollar signs in their Facebook posts. Like this: That's WHATCHA CALL MEGA MAG SHAPED UP AND TAKING THE COLOR GREEN AND GIVING IT THE JUSTICE IT NEEDS!!!!!!!!$$!!!!!!! ALLURE THEY AINT NEVER EVER SEEN ANYTHING TO LOOK LIKE U!!!!!$$!!!!!!! ALL THE GIRLS WISH THEY HAD A FACE AND A BODY LIKE URS!!!!!!!!!$$$$!!!!!!!!!!!! ALLURE U CAN WEAR UR DADDYS MONEY REAL REAL WELL!!!!!!!!!$$$$$!!!!!!!! ALLURE U ARE A MOVIESTAR!!!!!!!!!!! 
They make Facebook pages for their children basically when they're born. They have the craziest names ever. Like, Allure, Ritz, Lacoste, Starlett, Vogue, Porsche, Royalty, and Malibu for girls. Over half the boys are named John or Johnny. (a lot of the older girls are named Mary or Catherine...they're Catholic) 










They have a "camp" as we call it and all live around each other. They don't like outsiders and definitely don't want you in their camp. My aunt's niece, Hannah and I took one of our friends over there to see the houses one night because, like everyone not from Augusta, she didn't believe us. We rode around several streets and every few miles, we'd see a black truck behind us. We realized they were following us and quickly got out of dodge!! They build extravagant houses, but they live in trailers behind the houses for years! The board up the windows, and when I was growing up the rumor was that they had to wait so many years to get out the evil spirits before they moved in the house. Recently, I've learned that it's not accurate. They usually do that because they don't have the money to finish the houses, and to keep their million dollar carpet from fading! They also don't want anyone to see inside the house until the have their party. Once the house is complete, they throw a huge party for everyone to come see the new house. 

                                 

I've always thought the houses were beautiful, but I've obviously never been inside of one, until yesterday! I have some friends who own a construction company and they're building a house for some of the travelers. (these actually have the money to finish the house! ha!) During my lunch break yesterday, they let me come and look at the house! Y'all. I was in gypsy heaven! I kept repeating the word "insane" because that's the only thing I could say about it. I wish I could have taken pictures of everything to show y'all. The house I saw had 3 floors, an elevator, and a double staircase on all three floors. A cast iron fence lined the property with huge gates in the front. Four chandeliers hung in the foyer, JUST THE FOYER. Which by the way, the chandeliers have to be assembled by the builders. 12 hours go into making just ONE of those bad boys. They had rounded double steps in the back yard leading to the balcony. They have a game room, a theater room, 4 bed rooms, 2 kitchens-one is the husband's kitchen for his game room, dining room, eating area, living room, tv room, and an extra bathroom for the wife to get ready in and put her "hair chair." Not because she's a beautician, but for people to COME OVER TO FIX HER HAIR! Seriously, insane. It's so elaborate, but, lawd have mercy it was beautiful! Their garage was probably big enough to fit an entire normal house.  
See how the windows have paper in them? These people couldn't pay to finish this house yet, so the continue to live in that little trailer behind it. 


I picked these to show a little bit on the inside of this house. (not the one I saw) But you can tell how extravagant everything is! 

Travelers are seriously cray, but I really want to get to know them. I think it'd be so much fun to be able to go to all their parties! I guess I'll just continue to stalk them on Facebook and stare at them in public! If you ever want to see all this crazy in real life, c'mon! Augusta welcomes you! 


Happy Tuesday! 

XoXo,
AK 

Thursday, March 13, 2014

Maybe I should just forget about love!

If you've been around here for a minute, you know I've signed myself up for a dating site or two since the beginning of the year. I'm sure that I'm not alone in this new venture of
online dating, but some people and profiles really annoy me. Let's start simple, shall we.

1. Guys with no shirt in their profile picture.
Why is this ok?! I don't take pictures of myself without a shirt on and just because you don't have boobs...well SOME of you don't have boobs, doesn't mean you should. I don't really care to know what your stomach looks like before we even meet you. Just stop.


2. Pictures that are half cropped. 
If you're posting pictures to a dating website, do not post pictures of  you and your hot "friends" or ex girlfriends that you've tried to crop, but you still see her face and blonde hair. It's just weird. How are we supposed to know if that girl is really your ex or sister?


3. Overly flirtatious/Terms of Endearment 
Last night, a guy called me "sweetheart" and I quickly responded with "Do not call me sweetheart. You do NOT know me." Seriously, I could be the meanest person on the planet, and he called me sweetheart which would not fit. He doesn't know me and has no right to use terms of endearment to me. Needless to say, he didn't respond. A-OK with me.


4. Conversations 
People that start conversations with the usual "hey, how are you?" or whatever, then they expect YOU to keep the conversation flowing. Uh, no sir. You started this conversation, you will figure out something to talk about. kthxbye.

5. Distance
I live in Georgia. If you're viewing my profile, "wanting to meet me", and sending me a message but you live in Texas, we have a slight problem called distance. I'm not driving to Texas to see how a first date would go with you, so why are you messaging me? I'm sorry, but it doesn't make a lick of sense to even respond to your message so I probably won't.


All of this and yet I'm STILL browsing profiles and active on POF. My only conclusion for this could possibly be...


What are your dating website pet peeves?! 
Happy Thursday! 

XoXo,
AK

Friday, March 7, 2014

ACA-AWKWARD!

I can't believe I'm actually doing this, but if you can't laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at?! I'm linking up with Kelly today for a little SUYL Friday...AWKWARD!
I've done something similar before, but I tried to find the BEST of the WORST pictures. You know, the ones that showed how terrible I dressed, but not the really awful, hideous, my parents shouldn't have let me out in public ugly. And let me prepare you, it was UGLY. Like, you ain't got no alibi ugly.

Also. I'm not even going to edit these.

Ok, this is really just cute. But I wanted to start you off gently. It gets way worse after this. I promise. 
I'm the awkward little one cheesin' like it's my job in the front.

I apologize for the poor quality on this one. It's like my own awkward family photo. 
Except this girl isn't my family...she was my friend. And not best friend.
WHY ARE WE MATCHING? and who thought it'd be a good idea for us to get a picture together while matching?! That face. I was like a Butterball Turkey.

Yep. That's me in the front with the hideous hair and outfit. 
I LOVED that outfit. I thought that belt you cannot see was the coolest. 
I was supposed to be dressed up...for my cousin's graduation. 
But, shout out to my hot-stuff sister, VA! 

This was my sister Alicia's graduation service at church. Apparently bandanna material was popular then.
I remember I had that dress, shoes, a purse, and jeans with bandanna and I wore.them.out. 
That hair. Oh my lawd that hair. 

1. WHY am I holding a tree branch? 
2.WHY didn't someone tell me that this horrible shade of red looked stupid on me? 
3. Pretty sure this was my profile picture on the Myspace for the longest! 


I wore t-shirts almost every single day. 
And I also thought that big earrings would dress it up. 
I always, always, always wore big earrings and a t-shirt. Why?  I have no idea. And my hair was almost always up. (sometimes with a ribbon because high school.)
{I passed my graduation tests, though. 5 out of 5 baby!}


This wasn't too awkward, but I LOVED to wear that stupid purple shirt with a long sleeve shirt under it. Like there are multiple pictures of it. 
I looked like Barney, y'all. And this was BEFORE the skinny jeans thing took off, so I wore it with what appears to be light-wash-too-big jeans. HOT MESS. Emphasize on the mess. 


This was on vacation to Panama City. 
I interned at a local hospital that summer for a month and that was the shirt I had to wear while working. 
Why I took it to the beach and ACTUALLY wore it out to eat is beyond me. 
Also. Glasses. Thank God for contacts!! 

So, how awkward were you?!
Happy Friday! 

XoXo,
AK




Wednesday, February 26, 2014

Happy Birthday, Alabama!



Happy 5th Birthday, Alabama Grace!!! 

I can't believe it's been FIVE whole years since my life changed forever and I became an aunt. 


The excitement and fun you bring to our lives is immeasurable! 
You are sassy and sweet all rolled into one adorable little girl! 


You are the perfect mix of your Mama and me. 
You are hilarious, and have such a sweet heart! 



I'm so thankful that I get to be your aunt!! God surely has blessed us way more than we deserve by sending you into our lives! 

I love you to pieces, baby girl!!
XoXo,
-Kah Kah 

Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Winter Blues

Winter in Georgia has been one of a kind this year!! First snow, then ice, then an earthquake. The end of times are near, no doubt! I remember the last "ice storm" we had, I was in middle school. The power was out for DAYS and the entire city was shut down. (no atlanta jokes. we live in the south for a reason.) Kinda like last week. We had Jim Cantore from The Weather Channel in our town, Waffle Houses were closing because they didn't have any food, and cops were handing out tickets just for driving on the roads! Stuff like this absolutely never happens here. ESPECIALLY not twice in the same month! (we're actually predicted to get more snow/ice the beginning of March, but i'm betting the grocery stores have something to do with this one just to see how much more bread and milk they can sell.)

I usually don't mind winter and the only season I typically wish away is summer because I'm not in school anymore and I hate the beach, but this year I am SO DONE with winter. I'm ready to move on to spring!! This week, the weather is going to be in the SEVENTIES. Welcome to freakin' Georgia. And low seventies scream spring. Which screams baseball. Which tells me to scream GO BRAVES and FREE HUGS and WELCOME TO THE JUNGLE!


Football had it's time, and I basked in the SEC glory every single Saturday like every other fan, but that season, because yes, football is a season of the year in the south, has come to a close. And it's time for a new one that involves 9 innings and home runs to begin. I'm so ready for Braves paraphernalia in every store, seeing Freddie Freeman on 1st base,  trips to Turner Field, doing the chop, the 7th inning stretch, doing the wave, and most of all Opening Day! Which I think should be a national holiday. Baseball is SO close I can smell it, but yet it's still so far away! I'll just be over here twiddling my thumbs until April so I can fill my days with watching Braves baseball again.

Anyone else ready for baseball?!

Happy Tuesday!!

XoXo,
AK


Thursday, February 6, 2014

Everyday I'm Hustlin'

Nausea
Butterflies 
Joy
Excitement
Tears
Fear
Prayers
Loss of sleep
Hustle
Hard work
Dedication
Determination 


All of those words combined bring one thing to my mind. Dreams. Dreams are hard. They keep you up late, wake you up early, require time, effort, hustle, tears, determination, and talent but all those things are what brings a dream to life. 

To quote Jon Acuff, "If your dreams don't scare you, they're not big enough." And how true that is! I'm working on a new adventure with a friend and for me, it's scary! 
What if no one likes my dream? What if I can't get any clients? What if I never make any money? What if my friend and I disagree and it can't be resolved? What if my dream tanks before I can even start? Those fears and worries may seem trivial to you, but they are spinning around in my head constantly. 
But, even though I'm nervous, there's also excitement, joy and every other emotion possible involved, too. 
None of that is going to stop me, though. I'm going to "punch fear in the face" and make my dream become a reality. I'm not going to give up because it gets messy. There's no throwing in the towel because I gave a proposal and it didn't work out. I'll get discouraged on the regular, but instead of giving up I'll hustle! 

I'm past ready for a new adventure! Bring.It.On. 

Happy Thursday! 
XoXo,
AK 


Wednesday, February 5, 2014

Southern Laughter

It's no surprise to anyone that I love to laugh. And I'm aware that it's an annoying, loud laughter. Guess what? I.don't.care. I'm a firm believer in "laughter is the best medicine." I swear if laughing could burn some serious calories, I'd be a dang supermodel by now!!
The two people who usually have me laughing the most are my cousin Kevin and my sister VA. (sometimes Ad, too.) It's like we "bring out the funny" in each other. Seriously, I say all the time we should have our own reality show. We're really all just a funny family!

I'm going to share a couple of my favorite funny videos with you today! These few videos are the epitome of the glorious South and that's why I love them so much. I've watched these so many times, I quote most of them in everyday conversation. It's an illness, really. So, take some time on this rainy Wednesday and laugh. It's really good for the soul!














Happy Hump Day! 

XoXo,
-AK